Published January 5, 2009
Well its cold outside
and you know that,
yet still you stand there.
And if breathing sometimes makes your eyes
drip, shaky, to the floor,
don’t tell us.
Because we love to see beauty in the negative,
even if only illusion,
and pretend we can’t hear screaming
through the wood of that closed door.
Try it sometime when you have
no feeling.
Metal sinks in numbness easy.
Just to see if it works.
And there are times when you see everything
past a pupil,
and there are times when you know that they are gone.
But then you reach out anyway,
and there’s no answer because
nobody
is
home.
It’s that look they sometimes get.
That one where they can hear the screaming,
but don’t have the strength to open the door
on their own.
The one where they see past mirages.
The one where they know that blood stains on
solitude
is close to joy.
Not quite.
The look that makes them stand outside
knowing they are freezing,
immobile.
That look you see sometimes,
often?
Too often.
In the mirror.
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Canary word: Present
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140,620 Literary Works • 673,561 Reviews
something that is worth expanding on
good job!
i liked it a lot. it provides a creepy feeling, without needing to be overly morose or morbid.
i think the first three lines are the most incredible.
That was really great! Reading it gives you a really weird feeling, like you understand it, and yet you don't. But, then again, I like those kind of poems. You're a great writer, maybe you could help me out sometime. I'm only beginning. Well, keep up the good work, and send me a signed copy of your first book... You'll shine someday!!!
this has a very dark, very chilling feel to it, like cold insanity, seeping through the gap under the door.
Well, I like your line breaks, they make it interesting, haltingly, and well, keep it suspenseful,
this poem really, really, was like looking into the mind of I dont know, a psychopath,
in fact im not exactly sure what this poem is about,
but its good, I mean really good.
like axe-murderer, stalker-creepy good, schizophrenic good.
either way, it's like... like...
LIKE A NIGHTMARE!!!
thats it.
holy blood and ashes, this poem makes me want to hide under the bed.
sorry, good poem though, Gold Star,
Peace,
God
Wow. This poem was creepy. It was chilling, and I liked it. The atmosphere was well conveyed here, and it was very well written. However, having some lines long and others extremely short seemed a little strange.
This was definitely my favorite part. I'm sorry that I couldn't be more helpful but this poem was excellent! One gold star for you.